Jobscam scum

Today Mr Baskerville, in his continuing hunt for Top Job*, applied for a temp blog writing position. It was for a "health" supplement. Anyway, Mr Baskerville thought that he could create articles extolling the benefit of healthy eating, and exercise, and could mention the client's product as part of a healthy diet.**

So he sent off his resume, all hopeful and eager***, and was delighted when he received a reply, saying he seemed like an excellent fit for the position, and his writing samples were fantastic!

After a quick Snoopy Dance Mr Baskerville read further, and discovered that in order for him to create blog posts extolling this particular product, he first had to purchase it, by clicking on the link helpfully provided.

And sending his credit card info.

Bollocks. Excitement rapidly segued into rage, and Mr Baskerville had to consume a large bar of chocolate and several cups of tea before he calmed down.

Hey, Cadbury's, if you're reading this Mr Baskerville will be delighted to extol your product. You don't even need to pay him money, he'll do it for the chocolate.

*though really, the Holy Grail is becoming a more likely find
**does that make him a ho?
***he's hopeful and eager every day, excitedly scanning the job boards and composing cover letters, till the cold reality of the economic situation kicks him in the teeth.

Job Descriptions

The company, apparently, 'swings for home runs'*. WTF? WTFingF? Can't we at least take it as read that any company wants to be successful? It's the equivalent of Mr Baskerville saying in his resume that his goals include breathing, eating and seeking shelter at night.

The job description goes on to claim that they want to hire candidates with a demonstrated record of curiosity. Is this a veiled plea for Dogging enthusiasts?

Mr B is not going to apply.

*Given, of course, that the company is not actually manufacturing baseball bats, players, or steriods

Pants on Fire

Today Mr Baskerville sent out a cover letter including the phrase "I look forward to producing design solutions to communicate corporate messages with high visual impact."

He does not even know what that means. He would have a lot more luck it was to communicate corporate massages.

He could write that ad in no time, probably incorporating a large starburst. All he'd need would be the words "Happy Ending" luridly displayed. In fact, "Happy Endings" and a phone number, job done.

Mr Baskerville has often thought his talents are wasted (well, currently they are wasted in unemployment) on newspaper and magazine ads. He should be marketing pron. He has a way with words and a well developed sense of humour, and what more could you possibly need?

Obviously the actual actors need other attributes to be well developed, but that is not Mr B's concern. Luckily.

Moved

Mr Baskerville was busy moving house recently. He therefore has not had time to blog or twat. No, he has been busy, sitting on the floor surrounded by all his boxed possessions, drinking wine and reading Stargate fanfic.